Question:I would like to invite you to a discussion around the topic of behavior at table. I want to know how important manners are to you, how consistent or relaxed are you? Are table manners important to you or are you happy if your child eats anything at all, that you do not care HOW it eats ?!
- reply - 1: I'll get started. In the standard we eat together at the table, during the week Marvin and I alone, on the weekend also my husband. Every meal. The exception is when it is later and the Sandman comes, then we also eat in the room on the couch. But that is rare. At table Marvin is like every 2-year-old, sometimes fidgety, sometimes barefoot and sometimes praiseworthy calm and well-mannered. Today, however, he has drained enormous, including pudding from the mouth through the teeth and squeeze on the table spit. Since the fun was over for me and therefore the food. Have him then taken off the table. Marvin does not have to sit like the little lord, I do not expect impeccable manners, but I do not think that kaffeereien and spits do not belong at the table and that is immediately suspected. Oh and food on hand because he does not want to sit at the table there is NOT with us! I think if you start with something you do not have to wonder why the little ones can no longer behave at table sometime. My opinion.
- reply - 2: Hello Ruthy,
Great topic, I'm curious!
So my husband always comes home very late, so that Benjamin is mostly alone and I eat a little something. Usually he has no hunger in the evening because he always eats so much in the crib, so that it is usually a smear (eat toppings from the bread, smear cream cheese with a finger ..), if it is too much is the food finished, because you can see exactly when he is hungry he eats differently. Mostly it runs out in the evening with him on fruit (grape, apple or banana) out, what else has usually no sense ... unfortunately.
Since they are allowed to eat relatively "freely" in the crib, it is also always tried to fool around with their hands in the lunch, which we do not want. We have to admonish him again and again to take the spoon or the fork, which is actually very important to us and also that he keeps his dirty hands on the table and does not smear on the chair, which I find very important, because if But sometimes in a restaurant, I do not want that he smears everywhere with his fingers ... I do not want that as the next guest on the pants ...
He always does good food when he is really hungry and enjoys it ...
I always wish that he tried everything, but then I do not force him, but he is also very much like fruit and salad and I'm glad about that.
If we are in the restaurant, we never order him anything extra, but he gets from us, because I do not want that he always "an extra sausage" gets, since he is not much anyway, it is also too bad for me the good food, because the children's portions are usually very large and not for a 2-year-old. Later he will be able to choose what is available, as he is allowed to do at home.
Phew that was a novel now, but I hope you understand what I wanted to say
- reply - 3: Hello Diana,
Thank you for your novel;) I know that with the children's portions, where we were with the family in Cologne, and for Marvin ordered a child's portion of chips with nuggets, which was just as luscious as my portion of chips with schnitzel. He did not even manage half of that ... but fortunately we did not have to pay it, we were invited;)
With the free food (hands into the meal, etc.) I also find ugly! Of course, fries, chicken, nuggets, potato wedges can be eaten by hand, but vegetables, mashed potatoes, etc., I think I disgusting.
A while ago there was an interview in the newspaper with Lilly Becker, wife of Boris Becker, where I read that, I just thought, I'm crazy!
She was in the restaurant with her Amadeus and the kid fumbled around at the table screaming that she was embarrassed. There she got up and left and pretended that the nanny was his mother !! Unbelievable??? The ticks not really right ... if our one would do that, leave the child alone because it is embarrassing and pretend as if the table neighbor his father ... crass ....
- reply - 4: Hello! Very interesting topic!
On a minimum of manners, I also worth it. So we all eat together at the table and since Lauri 10 months old is about. During the week we only get together in the evening, but at the end of the week all meals are served. In the beginning it was a real mess when Lauri ate his porridge. But I thought, he should just try everything nice. As the food became more "normal", so he ate the same as we did, so too were the piglets. In the meantime he can handle the fork and the spoon almost perfectly. Also with soup. He starts slowly with the knife. Try to smear his bread or cut out the Sunday bun or behead the egg. Or to cut the meat at lunchtime. I'm actually halfway satisfied. Of course there are days where he rumkaspert, but then we intervene.
Even in the restaurant he behaves decently. Due to the many visits of the family we have often eaten out. At first I always ordered a children's plate, but he never liked those things. So most of the time I had his food and he meant mine, hi hi. So we only order a separate plate for him and he is with alllen. The secret is just to have something to play for the breaks between the courses. This relaxes the situation enormously. And our advantage is that it is terribly loud in Spanish restaurants, a screaming child will never notice !!
Our only problem is our inner bastard. I never wanted my children to watch TV while eating. But now our dining table in the living room (although a separate area, but just in sight of the TV) and often "forget" I turn off the TV for the Sandman. Then of course he is distracted and hardly eats. Until I just stop and I make the TV. But why not immediately, I ask each time ????
Soo, now I've also written a novel ...
- reply - 5: We always eat together. First, Noah gets his food because he needs help lubricating or the food can cool down until we have something on the plate. When all are done we say good appetite and off you go! Lately, Noah also wanted to hear a table saying before, then of course this is done. During the meal we talk, if you want. What does not exist are players. In the old days, when Noah was fed, the plane never came, so he did not learn to play while eating. Noah is allowed to sit as he likes, even on his knees when he is sitting in a big chair. We always eat in the kitchen and Noah is allowed to use his hands, always encouraging him to take the cutlery. Usually Noah also uses the cutlery and fingers just to push the food on it (before it's over the edge) or when he's very tired. After the meal Noah will sit until we are done and will volunteer to clean up (I would not ask for that). All in all, we do not need any rules as Noah always eats properly, both in manners and how much he eats. And if he does not want to eat anything, then he has to wait until we're done and then get up. But that does not mean anything sweet until the next meal and certainly not on the hand. On the hand there is at most a biscuit or fruit.
- reply - 6: @ Ruthy: That's really blatant, well as a celebrity you can just allow a lot ...
But you also experience a lot in restaurants, I mean nobody expects from children perfect table manners and I think from a certain age (at least school age!) Children should ever be able to sit until all are done (even at home) and then play around. .this annoys me always with my sister-in-law, because the children eat only a little something (because they have already eaten full) and then they jump after 5 min on and romp around. Since then Benjamin is also distracted and a reasonable food is unthinkable and how should I explain him then that he must stay sitting ...
We also usually take a small car and a book to the restaurant so that he can spend some time with himself.
Stephie there you are right, playing at the table or running around with food is not! Then there is an end to eating. But eating in the evening is almost impossible with Benjamin (at least during the week), at the weekend, when he does not get that much afternoon snack (usually just fruit or sometimes cake), he eats better in the evening. Therefore, I do not force him and there is only a trifle in the evening, nothing brings only bad mood with him and me.
- reply - 7: I went to the ice cream parlor with Marvin in the summer, there was also a teacher with a small group there, that was like 6-7 children, and the woman really did have a lot of trouble to get me in the right mood really sorry. Sure it is always something else if you are sitting with your own children in the restaurant or a horde of wild guys in the ice cream parlor but the good woman has roared downright hoarse because of the children not a clever sat or ate. A barked across the tables, a rumgerenne aufgespringe ... that annoyed even me and Marvin ... I thought so synonymous, auweia .. have probably not yet learned how to behave in public at the table.
Yeah, so on hand an apple piece or something, ok, but a friend of mine, if you little one wants to eat little: Ok nagut then stop! he gets his bread on the hand and may go from the table .. I'm totally wrong. When everyone sits and dines, the little ones stay seated. How do you say so nice: What Hans does not learn, Hans never learns !!!
Sure, it is sometimes stupid for Marvin when we all eat and he thinks he is ready and has to stay seated, he complains about it, but he has to go through it. I also do not like it when he gets up and tries to climb me on my lap while I'm eating, as my friend's little girl does, even with me !!!
What I wanted to ask: Pray one of you before eating? It used to be obligatory for us, my mum insisted on it, my big sister does it today but I left it altogether. Table saying yes, prayer no.
- reply - 8: We do not pray (I'm not even baptized, as well as our entire family). For me it's very strange, but of course, everyone has to decide for themselves. I know that from a friend, too. If we eat together, then her daughter immediately gets something else offered when she is a bit nervous. And if she does not eat that right, she can get up, and so on. Noah thinks that's totally stupid, because he prefers to play even though he's hungry, and then he eats worse than normal. Although it is still more than most children eat, but this unrest is transmitted to all.
- reply - 9: Yes, nagut, illness sometimes excuses everything;) I wanted to be a few days ago gaaaaaanz freaky and said to Marvin, hey, we want to have breakfast in the living room today aufm car carpet ?? Sure that's not a norm, that's the exception and I thought he was happy about something totaaal mad ... but no he brought everything I brought into the room in panic back to the kitchen and put on the table. He was not fond of that ... after the fifth time running back and forth, I let it have breakfast at the table as usual. I think he must be older, but it was still funny anyway :)
- reply - 10: Hihi, the darling little ones are also in a way habitual animals ....
We do not pray, nor are we baptized and have no relation to it, and as Stephie says, that's strange to me as well. My husband is Protestant, but he does not live it, but has insisted that Benjamin is baptized well ...
We only want a good appetite and then we go. Benjamin is allowed to taste everything at the table, but he does not have to eat it if he does not like it, as a child I always hated to eat things that did not taste good to me (I just think brussels sprouts ...) He should try it but I accept if he does not want it. He can choose in the evening at dinner himself (from 2-3 things) what he wants to bread and there he is then satisfied and if he does not want, then there is just nothing (he sometimes beats chocolates (Nutella) or Honey bread before ...)